How to Get Rid of Your Boyfriend
Have you ever met a guy, thought he was great, and realized later on you were wrong? Are you in that situation right now? Luckily, there are tons of ways to get rid of a pesky man, some better than others.
In My Experience…
A few years ago, my friend introduced me to a guy who had been “admiring me from afar.” I talked to him after work one evening, and he seemed nice and pretty cute. Unfortunately, when I saw him the next day in slightly brighter lighting, I realized he was less that attractive. To top it off, he was dumb, clingy, and just plain weird. He believed, because I had given him my phone number and talked to him for ten minutes the night before, that we were practically married!
For some reason, I did not have it in me to tell him to buzz off. So, I decided to try another method. I ignored him. He called constantly, and I never answered. (Thankfully, we had caller ID.) He came to the grocery store where I worked. Whenever I spotted him pull into the parking lot, I unashamedly ran to the back to the store and hid in the stockroom. Finally, after months of ignoring him, one of his friends clued him into the fact that I was not interested.
I think that ignoring someone is the slowest and cruelest way to get rid of them. Even though this guy got on my nerves, I still feel horrible about the way I treated him. All I had to do was tell him one time that I was not interested. So, even though ignoring your guy may work, I do not recommend it.
You can always try the opposite: smother him. Call him non-stop. Write him love letters. Send him flowers. Show up at his job, just because you “had to see him.” This is likely to work well on guys who are afraid of commitment. However, be aware that it could just make your guy think you’re ready to take the relationship to the next level!
Ask Him to Marry You!
If you want to really freak out your guy and take a step toward gender equality at the same time, ask him to marry you! Get down on one knee and propose, preferably in public. This method is only a good idea if you’re in a relationship where the possibility of marriage if simply absurd. Otherwise, you could end up engaged!
A slightly more subtle version of the same method is to leave marriage magazines and books lying around where your man will see them. If you’re really evil, start talking about all the babies you guys should have together. Again, there’s always a chance this could backfire. After all, any guy would be lucky to have tons of babies with you!
Stop Getting Pretty for Him
Nothing turns on a man quicker than no makeup, unwashed hair, body odor, unshaven legs, and baggy clothing. Try making yourself look as unattractive as possible for the next few dates, and see if your man doesn’t run the other way. This tactic requires a certain amount of self-confidence, as you’ll have to go out in public looking like, well, crap.
A Personal Story…
A few weeks ago, my sixteen year old sister told me she had a new boyfriend. Then, a week later, she said, “I think I may have made a big mistake!” The poor smitten boy had sent her text messages every morning that said, “Good morning, Beautiful!” He called incessantly. But the last straw came when they had dinner together with some friends. He insisted on holding her hand the entire time, even while they ate.
So, I asked her what she was going to do about her guy problem. I was quite impressed with her answer. She said, “I’m going to tell him I don’t want to go out with him anymore.” Guess what, her method is the best way to get rid of a guy. Be a woman, and tell him it’s just not working out. He will move on, and you’ll be able to spend your time with a guy you really like.